Islamic Religious Council of Singapore
16 September 2022 / 19 Safar 1444H
Strengthening Family Institution Through Islamic Values
Dear blessed congregants,
Let us continue to elevate our taqwa towards Allah (s.w.t.) by obeying all His commands, and abstaining from all of His prohibitions. May we continue to nurture our families with obedience and perseverance in worshipping Allah (s.w.t.).
Brothers and sisters,
In a hadith narrated by Imam Al-Tirmizi, it was reported that the Prophet (s.a.w.) said: "There is no better gift from a father to his son other than that of good character."
The hadith emphasises the role of the father, and by extent, the mother, in the education of our children. This is because good morals and manners need to constantly be cultivated over time.
Allah (s.w.t.) said in surah al-Tahrim, verse 6:
Which means: “O believers, guard yourselves and your families against a Fire fuelled by people and stones, over which stand angels, stern and strong; angels who never disobey God’s commands to them, but do as they are ordered.”
The verse above affirms the role of both parents in the family, emphasising that our children should consistently be guided with religious counsel. We must put in the effort to ensure that our children remain on the path of divine guidance, and that they avoid committing actions that invite the wrath of Allah (s.w.t.).
Let us take heed of the words of Saidina Ibn Umar (r.a.), recorded in the book “Tuhfah al-Maudud” by Imam Ibn Qayyim, which means: "Educate your child, for you will be held accountable for the upbringing and nurturing that you have given to him. And he will also be asked [on the Day of Judgment] about your goodness to him, and about his service to you.”
Dear blessed congregants,
The role of both parents in the family has now become even more important, given the rise of alternative lifestyles that are not in line with the morals, values, and the culture of our society and religion. Clearly, this has presented new challenges to parents in terms of providing guidance to their children.
Therefore, what is the best approach in guiding or educating the children from the younger generation in this regard? This phenomenon certainly requires a shift in the approach as well as the content of education that is delivered by both parents to their children.
The role of parents should not be limited to ensuring that their children are brought up with religious knowledge in performing acts of worship, such as praying and fasting. Indeed, today's parents also need to have the knowledge and provide guidance in dealing with their current environment and navigating the world as it presently is.
In this ever-changing landscape, parents need to be aware of the changing trends, and to understand the varying contexts of the issues on hand. This is so that they are better able to guide their children in overcoming the challenges of today, a task which includes discussing sensitive issues –such as those related to sexual education, adolescence, marriage, and family life.
Sayyiduna Ali (r.a.) said that which means: "Speak to people according to their level of k.nowledge. Would you want for Allah and His Messenger to be denied?"
Therefore, parents need to continuously be exposed to the different approaches in discussing sensitive issues, by understanding the nuances of such issues, and be aware of the proper and sound religious guidance related to them.
Brothers and sisters,
We can no longer take the same approach in raising our children based on our past upbringing.
Indeed, we need to be prepared to discuss issues more openly and be prepared to listen more before bringing forth religious guidance that is based on strong reasoning. Having strong confidence and belief in the values fostered through this approach will be an advantageous tool in building resilience within ourselves and our children, so that we are able to remain firm in our beliefs and remain aligned to the parameters and values of our religion.
We will also be able to implement this approach more effectively and reap the benefits if we do it by spending more family time and interacting with our children. Have conversations with them about everything, whether it is about school, work, or life.
Our willingness and readiness to listen to our children’s opinions and feelings will certainly enhance family harmony and strengthen family relationships. This is the most valuable investment that can be made when nurturing a resilient and harmonious family.
Let us work together to improve our relationships with each other. May Allah (s.w.t.) continue to grant us peace and well-being in our family lives. Amin. Ya Rabbal 'Alamin.
أَقُوْلُ قَوْلِي هَذَا وَأَسْتَغْفِرُ اللهَ العَظِيْمَ لِي وَ لَكُمْ، فَاسْتَغْفِرُوهُ إِنَّهُ هُوَ الغَفُوْرُ الرَّحِيْمُ
الْحَمْدُ للهِ حَمْدًا كَثِيرًا كَمَا أَمَرَ، وَأَشْهَدُ أَن لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ سَيِّدَنَا مُحَمَّدًا عَبْدُهُ وَرَسُولُهُ. اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ وَسَلِّمْ عَلَى سَيِّدِنَا مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَأَصْحَابِهِ أَجْمَعِينَ. أَمَّا بَعْدُ، فَيَا عِبَادَ الله، اِتَّقُوا اللهَ تَعَالَى فِيمَا أَمَرَ، وَانتَهُوا عَمَّا نَهَاكُم عَنْهُ وَزَجَرَ.
أَلَا صَلُّوا وَسَلِّمُوا عَلَى النَّبِيِّ الْمُصْطَفَى، فَقَدْ أَمَرَنَا اللهُ بِذَلِكَ حَيْثُ قَال فِي كِتَابِهِ الْعَزِيزِ: إِنَّ اللهَ وَمَلَائِكَتَهُ يُصَلُّونَ عَلَى النَّبِيِّ يَـا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا صَلُّوا عَلَيْهِ وَسَلِّمُوا تَسْلِيمًا. اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ وَسَلِّمْ وَ بَارِكْ عَلَى سَيِّدِنَا مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ سَيِّدِنَا مُحَمَّدٍ.
وَارْضَ اللَّهُمَّ عَنِ الخُلَفَاءِ الرَّاشِدِينَ المَهْدِيِّينَ أَبِي بَكْرٍ وَعُمَرَ وَعُثْمَانَ وَعَلِيِّ، وَعَن بَقِيَّةِ الصَّحَابَةِ وَالقَرَابَةِ وَالتَّابِعِينَ، وَتَابِعِي التَّابِعِينَ، وَعَنَّا مَعَهُم وَفِيهِم بِرَحْمَتِكَ يَا أَرْحَمَ الرَّاحِمِينَ.
اللَّهُمَّ اغْفِرْ لِلْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَالمُؤْمِنَاتِ، وَالمُسْلِمِينَ وَالْمُسْلِمَاتِ، الْأَحْيَاءِ مِنهُم وَالْأَمْوَاتِ. اللَّهُمَّ ادْفَعْ عَنَّا الْبَلَاءَ وَالوَبَاءَ وَالزَّلَازِلَ وَالْمِحَنَ، مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا وَمَا بَطَنَ، عَن بَلَدِنَا خَاصَّةً، وَسَائِرِ الْبُلْدَانِ عَامَّةً، يَارَبَّ الْعَالَمِينَ. رَبَّنَا آتِنَا فِي الدُّنيَا حَسَنَةً، وَفِي الْآخِرَةِ حَسَنَةً، وَقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ.
عِبَادَ اللهِ، إِنَّ اللهَ يَأْمُرُ بِالْعَدْلِ وَالْإِحْسَانِ، وَإِيتَاءِ ذِي الْقُرْبَى وَيَنْهَى عَنِ الْفَحْشَاءِ وَالْمُنكَرِ وَالْبَغْيِ، يَعِظُكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَذَكَّرُونَ، فَاذْكُرُوا اللهَ الْعَظِيمَ يَذْكُرْكُمْ، وَاشْكُرُوهُ عَلَى نِعَمِهِ يَزِدْكُمْ، وَاسْأَلُوهُ مِنْ فَضْلِهِ يُعْطِكُمْ، وَلَذِكْرُ اللهِ أَكْبَرُ، وَاللهُ يَعْلَمُ مَا تَصْنَعُونَ.